I’ve spent the last month or so pondering where my life should go next and within this month I’ve had more than a handful of mental “breakdowns”. I’ve never been the type of person to really dwell on my emotional lows. I usually freak out for a day then realize that my life is fine and keep moving.
Let’s just say I had another one yesterday (Monday), NBD (no big deal). Guess what? Today is Tuesday and I’m fine. See world, you keep moving and so do it.
Let’s get down to the juicy stuff. I’m dating again. I went on my first “date” on Saturday. But to be honest, it really wasn’t a date. It was more of a meet and greet. Like most of the world now-a-days, I’m dating online. Por que? Because meeting people at my age while having a full-time job is kind of hard. Finding someone who has the same interests as you do in the real world is like having a second full-time job. Sue me! I’m lazy.
I signed up for a particularly popular dating site about a week ago and within the first few days I stalked a few guys online because come-on, that’s what you’re suppose to do. Messaged a few here and there, responded to a few, didn’t respond to many and ended up connecting with someone I shall call “Aaron.”
Aaron, is nice. HIs messages and personality fit pretty well with my own — sarcastic, witty, funny and easy to talk to. Our first few plans to meet up fell through, but ultimately we decided on a pre-date drink meet up. Unfortunately, this involved bringing along my friend and dressing a little too fancy for a dive bar in the Mission. This didn’t stop us.
My first impression of Aaron as I walked into the bar, “look at that mustache.” Oh yes, Aaron was donning a bitchin’ ‘stache, which in the end I thought to be endearing. He obviously didn’t care what people thought and really enjoyed it, so I did as well. He bought me a drink as well as my girlfriend and throughout the two hours we were together kept checking in on his friends to see if they were meeting up with us so my friend wouldn’t be lonely (very sweet), but they all bailed on him. We talked about music, our previous night of drinking and if we were hurting, first date items like “What are you?”, “All time favorite band?” and “What makes you want to talk to someone?” All fun and interesting things you want to know about a person. He is pretty shy, but talkative at the same time and even proceeds to tell me a few things he later regrets — “I don’t know why I just told you that.” I set his mind at ease and tell him “random strangers always feel compelled to tell me things, don’t worry about it.” The best part of our pre-date had to be the random stranger who proceeded to make small talk with Aaron then ask “Hey dude, is that your girlfriend?” which in turn he replies with “No, we just met tonight.” Random stranger proceeds to hit on me… really hard. Even sneaking a dirty kiss on my cheek and a sly hand on my ass. “This guy is smooth,” says Aaron under his breath. He wasn’t smooth, but it was very memorable and something that we both won’t forget. At the end of the night he invites us to Southern Pacific Brew, but alas, the carriage will soon turn into a pumpkin and we have to head back home. We say goodbyes.
What’s next? Well, I hate playing the stupid waiting game. Do you text/call this person a few days after? An hour after leaving? Is this person into you? How do you know? Were there signs? Do you not want to seem desperate, pushy, etc? All of these small details about a situation you tend to over analyze when you are dating. How I handled it? Just not giving an eff. Why? Because the universe will right itself in some shape or form without my need to overanalyze a pre-date.
I like to live by the “If I want/like it, I go for it rule.” So in the case of dating, why would I wait to get in touch with someone I’d like to know more about? I didn’t wait, I sent Aaron a fun, witty text about meeting up again this Friday if he wasn’t busy. But of course he was. I guess a neighbor getting married in your backyard constitutes as being busy. I can’t blame him. I replied with “well, of course you are. I’m a free bird. Just tell me when to go.” Thus leaving the ball in his court.
Even though I’m waiting, I guess I play the game different and so far I’m liking it. I highly suggest you daters out there try it.